"Lauren,"
Hank scolded, "you really have got to stop worrying so much. You’ve made
it a full-time job! You worried about James failing high school. You worried
that the girls would marry deadbeat husbands who wouldn’t provide for them. You
worried about our flights getting cancelled before our vacation. Last month,
when you had that cold, you even worried about getting the whooping cough, of
all things. You worried about all these things, and none of them
happened!"
"See!"
Lauren exclaimed. "It worked!"
How many of us are
like Lauren? Sure, she was making a joke, she knew worrying didn’t do any good,
but in some situations it seemed to be all she could do. She had long ago
fallen into the habit of worrying, and she didn’t know how to fall out of it.
Research studies
have revealed that we typically worry five times as much about things that will
never happen as about things that actually do occur. That’s a lot of wasted
worry! If you’re this distracted, you cannot effectively live up to your
potential. Worry will drain your energy and stifle your commitment. Every
minute you spend worrying is a minute that you’re not committing. Worry is the
opposite of faith, so stop worrying, and deepen your faith.
One good way to
combat worry is to commit to memory Reinhold Niebuhr’s "Serenity
Prayer": "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot
change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the
difference."
Once you’ve
accepted the things you cannot change, how do you change the things you can?
Simply take a rational approach. Let’s say you have a new job and are worried
about making a mistake. The worrying mind quickly jumps to a worst-case — and
highly unlikely — scenario: If you make a mistake, you’ll get fired.
Rationally, you know this is improbable, but how do you prove it to yourself?
It’s simple. First, you break down the chain of events that would lead to your
firing. Then you assign a probability to each event; a rough estimate will do.
So what are the
real odds of your being fired? Even though each individual probability is just
a rough estimate, the total probability, which is the product of all these
individual probabilities, is a good ballpark estimate:
Probability of
being fired because of a mistake = 0.25 x 0.1 x 0.7 x 0.1 x 0.05 = .0000875, or
.00875% (less than one chance in ten thousand).
Now, doesn’t that
put things in perspective? This kind of rational approach can help you get a
handle on your worries. If the chances of your being fired because of a mistake
are less than one in ten thousand, there’s really no reason to worry about it.
I remember the
words of the wise baboon, Rafiki (is that an oxymoron?) for the Lion King fans,
"Hakuna Matata!", meaning "There are no worries!" Well,
that works great if you are living in the jungle ... in a movie.
However, for
today’s real world, I say, "No worries, take action!" Life’s rewards
go to those whose actions rise above their excuses ... and their worries.
So take positive
action today and wash away your worries!
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